Successful weight loss surgery comes from more than just cutting your stomach, re-routing your intestines or placing a band around the top of your stomach. Don’t get me wrong. You’ll lose weight from having surgery. But, in order to keep the weight off you have to make other changes. These changes are mental, internal. They require some soul searching and these changes have to be permanent.
Before you have surgery, you’re going to have to choose to like yourself. Most of us considering weight loss surgery have decided that we need to change the way we eat and we need the help of surgery. That’s OK. But, to make the change permanent you’re going to need to like yourself. You need to love yourself.
Below is a story about finding your vase.
“Once upon a time there was a poor, unfortunate man. He lived in squalor. Mice and spiders shared his home and it was rare that he ever bothered to clean it.
One day an old crazy wizard knocked on his door and gave him a beautiful vase. “It’s magic,” said the crazy wizard.
The man looked at the vase and figured he could sell it for a fair amount of money. He could buy some booze and spend the day in a happy daze.
But then the man looked at the vase again. He appreciated the vase’s beauty and since he never had anything quite so beautiful, he decided to keep it. He put it on his table and sat back to admire it.
It was clear that the vase was too beautiful to be empty. He went out and picked the finest flowers that he could find. Then he decided the vase was too stunning to be surrounded by mice and cobwebs. He cleaned the table and the cobwebs. He continued to clean his home until it felt cozy and the beauty of the vase matched the coziness and cleanliness of his home.
The man was no longer a poor, unfortunate man. He was a hardworking host who had no time for thoughts of his misfortune.”
What is our vase?
We all have a vase inside of us. It might be our personality, our heart, our faith, our childlike belief in the impossible. But we often lose track of our vase. We bury our vase with misfortune, bad experiences, bad relationships, the stress of balancing kids and jobs, and old memories that make us lose sight of how beautiful we really are.
Then, when we lose sight of our inner vase, we stop taking care of ourselves. We match the ugly, unkept inside with our outside. We don’t deserve to look good on the outside when we can’t even see good on the inside. We eat garbage and fill our bodies with fake, non-nutritious food.
Find your vase!
Find your vase. When you were a kid what made you special? What do your friends see that you don’t? Find your vase and plant flowers in it. Put that vase in the center of your mind, your heart. Build around it. Clean your body, your mind, and build around that vase.
I realize this seems very fluffy and new-age (which I’m generally not a fan of). But I truly believe we all have something that makes us who we are. Is it a curiosity for life? Is it a desire to help others? Is it an innate need to be good? Your spouse and your kids will be better served by having you take time for yourself to rediscover the good person you are. Find your vase. Build around your vase.
Only then will you take the time to clean house (your body and soul). When you love yourself, you’re more likely to take care of yourself.
How do you plant flowers and get rid of cobwebs? With good, wholesome, healthy food. With exercise and hard work. If you don’t believe you’re worthwhile, if you don’t believe you’re special, all your efforts will fail. You need to keep track of your vase and keep it close to your heart and mind. Only then can you expect long-term success, a true cleaning of your house. Change.
Where to start?
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